Ladies and gentlemen, for the next fifteen seconds at least, you're watching Fast and Loose. On the show tonight:
- He's just passed the League fitness test, Justin Edwards
- She's back, and this time it's personal, Jess Ransom
- He ate the thinking woman's crumpet, Greg Davies
- He's the third tallest Humphrey of all time, Humphrey Ker
- He's your friend and mine, but more yours, David Armand
- This week's charity competition winner, Marek Larwood
and finally, would you please welcome your host, a man who sounds a lot like me, Hugh Dennis.
- Speed Dating
- Terrible things to say at a speed dating event
- Weak Links
- Host: Hugh
- Justin - A man writing a letter to Points of View
- Jess - Characters from Downton Abbey
- Greg - A scary French teacher
- Humphrey - Trying to be "street"
- Interpretative Dance
- Performers: David, with Humphrey and Jess
- Song: Phil Collins - "You Can't Hurry Love"
- Right Way Wrong Way
- To behave during a job interview
- Performers: Greg and Jess, Humphrey and Justin
- Party Time
- The most pretentious thing you can think of
- Dragon's Lair
- Dragons: Humphrey and Jess
- Inventors: David and Greg
- Sideways Scene
- Performers: Justin, Marek, and Pippa
- Scene: Pippa is a bride having a dress fitted by designer Justin when her gangster fiancee Marek comes to the door with a gunshot wound to the leg because he's on the run from the police
- Styles: Poltergeist, Jackie Chan, The Great Escape, Transformers, King Kong
- First playing of "Dragon's Lair"
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