Good evening and welcome to Whose Line Is It Anyway? On tonight's show:
- It's going, going, gone, Brad Sherwood
- It's back-back-back-back-back-back-back-back-back, Wayne Brady
- Kiss that baby goodbye, Colin Mochrie
- We win! We win! Ryan Stiles
Hey, I'm Drew Carey. Welcome to the show. Come on, let's have some fun.
- Don't matter, like...
- Underwear to Sharon Stone
- What's in this cup; what do you care what I'm drinking?
- Weird Newscasters
- Anchor: Brad as "Chuck Flanksteak"
- Co-Anchor: Colin as "Harry Lambshanks" - In the Tour de France
- Sports: Wayne as "T Bone" - About to disturb a beehive
- Weather: Ryan as "Chip Beefontoast" - Fighting the inner urge to be a stripper
- Singers: Brad and Wayne
- Musicians: Laura and Linda
- About: Dina, a marketing manager for thermostats
- Style: Teen 1950s song
- Whose Line?
- Performers: Colin and Ryan
- Scene: Ryan is Obi-Wan Kenobi and he's training Colin, who is Luke Skywalker, to be a Jedi knight
- "From now on, I want to be known as Helen."
- "My shorts are on fire."
- "Don't miss The Drew Carey Show, Wednesday nights on ABC." (Oh wait, there's more. "Give the tall guy more lines.")
- "The Canadians are coming! The Canadians are coming!"
- Party Quirks
- Host: Brad
- Wayne - Entire halftime show at the Superbowl
- Colin - Has found Drew Carey's secret diary
- Ryan - The tortoise and the hare racing
- Host: Brad
- Scenes from a Hat
- Rejected endings for the blockbuster movie Titanic
- Personal messages you'd like to see flying from the back of an airplane
- Bad songs to sing in prison
- Inappropriate first date greetings
- What he's thinking while he's kissing you
- Bad parental motivational speeches
- Wayne Brady
- Losers get to do a game with Drew
- Wayne reads the credits as a general giving a gung-ho pep talk to his troops just before going into battle
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